Zach Jenkins: Enemy of Birds Everywhere

My husband is an enemy to birds. He must be. After two murderous episodes, no other explanation seems possible.

Back in August, we were in Wyoming for a family reunion. And because Americans like to shoot guns in order to bond, I left Zach outside with his brothers and retreated into the house, safely away from the guns. They started shooting "clay" pigeons. A few minutes into the bonding, something went terribly awry. It was Zach's turn to shoot. The clay pigeons were fired into the air and he took aim. However, just as the bullet was about to make contact with the clay pigeon a real bird flew right into the bullet's trajectory and fell out of the sky.

Zach explained that the poor bird "got in his way..." This seems like a freak accident, right? Well that's what I thought too, until this morning.

When I woke up, he leaned over to me and said "something bad happened when I was driving home last night..." Naturally, I began to envision a speeding ticket or a small accident, but I was wrong. Apparently, as he was driving down State Street really late last night in the rain, a duck (the kind with the green head as Zach described it) appeared in the road ahead of him. He didn't have time to stop. Seconds later, he saw a bunch of feathers flying behind the car. He couldn't see a body, and it wasn't stuck under the car (I made him check this morning...)so we will never know exactly what happened, but as you can see, this is a very disturbing trend...